Tuesday, April 15, 2014

From The WTF Files...

What the what?

Worker thinks body is mannequin, hauls it to dumpster
The body of a 96-year-old woman who fell from the 16th story of an apartment building where she had lived for years was toted to a trash bin because a clerk at the building thought the body was a mannequin.

Overnight desk clerk Ron Benjamin, 61, at Peterborough Apartments near downtown told investigators that he thought that the body was part of an April Fool's prank when he took a smoke break about 4:30 a.m. ET Wednesday and saw Nan Yates' body on the ground.
Now, as it turns out, the woman was 96 years old and decided to check out on her own terms - by swan-diving off the 16th floor. Folks, if you make it to 96 and are capable of flinging yourself off a 16th floor balcony, that's a pretty good life right there. The worker in question happened across the body after it had been on the ground for a while, and the theory is that rigor mortis had set in.

Folks, I don't know about you, but something tells me that a 96 year old woman taking a 16 story dirt dive isn't going to look anything even remotely like a mannequin. I don't even want to know what the heck the mannequins look like in this dude's neighborhood. I'm thinking they have to be a cross between The Joker and something out a Tim Burton animation...

And now that I've put THAT mental image in your head...

That is all.

5 comments:

Dave H said...

The light's not very good at 4:30 AM this time of year, and one wouldn't expect a mannequin that someone left lying on the ground to be in good shape.

Can you imagine the squick you'd get when you found out that thing you manhandled into the dumpster was a person though? That's nightmare fodder right there.

Bubblehead Les. said...

Movie Quote Time!

"Damn. Somebody threw away a perfectly good White Boy."

Brad_in_MA said...

Les,

You get extra style-points for referencing Better Off Dead.

This mountain is covered in pure snow !!! Do you know the street-value of all this ??!!

Old NFO said...

Sigh... Attention to detail...

TOTWTYTR said...

I've seen the bodies of people who fell or jumped from buildings that tall or taller.

There is no way on earth, unless you are stoned or a complete moron, that you are going to mistake that for a mannequin.

Maybe the whole story is an April Fools joke.