Monday, July 22, 2013

Monday Afternoon LOLs...

Courtesy of OldNFO comes this good 'un:
New definition for S.O.S.

A C-130 H was lumbering along when a cocky F-16 flashed by. The jet jockey decided to show off. The fighter jock told the 130 pilot, 'watch this!' and promptly went into a barrel roll followed by a steep climb. He then finished with a sonic boom as he broke the sound barrier.

The F-16 pilot asked the 130 pilot what he thought of that?

The 130 pilot said, 'That was impressive, but watch this!'

The C-130 droned along for about 5 minutes and then the 130 pilot came back on and said: 'What did you think of that?'

Puzzled, the F-16 pilot asked, 'What the heck did you do?'

The C-130 pilot chuckled.

'I stood up, stretched my legs, walked to the back, took a leak, then got a cup of coffee and a cinnamon roll.'

When you are young & foolish - speed & flash may seem a good thing.

When you get older & smarter - comfort & dull is not such a bad thing.

Us older folks understand this one, it's called S.O.S. ~ ~ Slower, Older and Smarter!!
I subscribe to a similar philosophy with my motorcycle. Sure, the Harleybago isn't going to carve up the corners like a Ducati. It will never have the off-the-line HOLY COW factor of a Hayabusa. In terms of sheer mileage, it's unlikely to touch a Goldwing. But what it does have in spades is comfort - I put ~ 400 miles on the Electra Glide in a single day, and at the end of the day was still able to walk. Try that on a CBR 900RR...

Also, more importantly, it's comfortable for a passenger (and yes, I know the 'Wing is as well). When I got the Harley I had two small children, and hoped that someday they would want to go for rides on the motorcycle. With the large backrest, grab handles, and foot boards, the Electra Glide is an excellent introduction to riding on the back of a motorcycle. Behind Daddy. The only way my little girl will ever ride on the back of a motorcycle.

At least while there is breath in this body and guns in the armory... :)

That is all.


Angus McThag said...

Can we agree that once you put reverse on it, you can no longer consider it a bike?

Jay G said...

Hey, don't pick on the poor Hondabago...

Dave H said...

In our MSF class one of the instructors (who rode a Goldwing) told us about teaching his wife how to lift the bike back up if it fell over. The other instructor interrupted and said, "Why? That thing won't fall, it just leans over at a 45 degree angle."

But yeah, comfort takes the day. When I went to buy a new bike I originally wanted a Triumph Bonneville. But when I compared its skinny little street bike seat with that of an America (and gauged the relative fit to my own widening frame) the America won.

wolfwalker said...

Long ago a tale was told of a BUFF (Big Ugly Fat Fella, a.k.a. a B-52) returning from an air raid over Vietnam accompanied by a "Little Friend" (F-4 Phantom). The fighter jock, being .... well, a fighter jock, got bored and decided to show off a little: rolls, a loop or two, you know the sort of thing, accompanied on the radio by various "Watch this" sorts of comments, and very obviously rubbing in the fact that he was flying this wonderfully aerobatic fighter, not a lumbering flying truck.

The pilot of the BUFF watched for a while in silence -- after all, you don't want to insult the guy who's protecting you from enemy fighters, do you? -- but eventually he could take no more. So when the fighter jock finished his next maneuver, the B-52 pilot said to him, "That's all real nice, friend ... but I bet I can do something you can't."

A minute or so passed, and the BUFF pilot said, "There!"

The fighter pilot said "I didn't see anything." And indeed he hadn't.

The B-52 pilot said, "I just shut down two engines. Can you top that?"

wolfwalker said...

(PS: for those who aren't airplane geeks: the B-52 has 8 engines, the F-4 just 2. And without at least one burning, the F-4 had a glide angle not much better than a brick.)

BGMiller said...

I recall reading a story from the early days of SAC wherein an bomber crew on a training mission were being annoyed by a hotdog in the latest and greatest thing in jet interceptor. So the bomber crew very slowly throttled back to just above stall speed. The poor youngster in his swept wing wonder had to disengage or fall out of the air. Seems his stall speed was something close to a hundred knots higher than the bomber.

Now I have to go find the story again.


PA State Cop said...

F4 is proof given enough thrust even a brick can fly.

Old NFO said...

Heh... I actually pulled something similar off Libya back in the day- I knew a friend was coming out in an F-14 to play, so when they joined on us, I held up a 6 pack and a per diem check... I DID pay for that one later... :-)

Rob said...

I always liked this story told by an SR-71 pilot (can't copy pasta because it's too long):

Geodkyt said...

Rob --

Oneupsmanship, like a Boss.

Sailorcurt said...

On your "Harleybago"...

That's why I went with a Valkyrie Interstate. I wanted the comfort, but had some other requirements as well.

It actually looks like a motorcycle (rather than some sort of two wheeled plastic spaceship), isn't so heavy that I can't pick it up or needs a reverse gear, but is comfortable and has all the bells and whistles I could want (I'm comfortable doing 750 miles in 13 hours with no problem).

Oh...and I could have bought two Valkyries for what you paid for your there's that.

But I have to admit I love the sound of the big Harley V-twin. There's nothing quite like it...except maybe a 1930's era John Deere.

Jay G said...

The Valk Interstate would have been a contender if they had still be making it, actually.

And check your math. I looked into what a comparable Honda cost vs. the Harley. While your math might have been correct 20 years ago, it's nowhere near that different now.

Harley Road King MSRP: $17,699
Honda Interstate MSRP: $13,240

Sailorcurt said...

The prices have evened out considerably, and I was admittedly exaggerating a bit to begin with, but when I bought my Valk, Harleys were significantly more expensive for a comparably equipped bike...not to mention significantly less reliable and significantly lower performance.

I was mainly being tongue in cheek and I don't have anything against Harleys. As with every American biker, I love the mystique and history of them.

But the bottom line is that, at the time I bought my Valk, it was a superior machine, with better performance and lower price. I haven't regretted the decision for one second. My Valk has been rock-solid dependable, I still love the styling and the ride, she still has incredible performance even with the relatively small engine compared to modern touring bikes, and after 11 years, I could sell her today for around 75% of what I paid.

And if we didn't give each other a hard time over what we choose to ride, we could hardly call ourselves bikers, now could we?

(A running joke with my Harley riding friends is they always start their bikes and rev them up and then say (or, rather, yell) to me "go ahead and start your bike, I want to hear it...oh it is started...ha ha. It's become tradition. I can't ride with them without them making fun of my "quiet" bike at least once. But at some point in the day, I'll find an opportune time to leave them in the dust and wave as I blow by them, so it evens out.)

Jay G said...

I know I'm flirting with disaster here, but I've had my FLHT for 10 years (as of next month) and she has been just as reliable as the Honda Magna she replaced. I've left the pipes stock and she's quieter than most other bikes, just that understated "potato potato" that's made Harley an icon.

The Valkyrie is one of the few bikes that ever scared me. I took one out for a demo ride at one of the open houses the Honda dealer near me used to have, and man, there's just a LOT of get-up-and-go when you twist your wrist.

I doubt even one of the new Harley performance center bikes could keep up with a 10+ year old Valk.

And if you're on anything bigger than a moped, I'll wave to you. Don't have to be a Harley.

Sailorcurt said...

I hope you continue to have good luck with your Hog.

I have a buddy who bought an anniversary edition heritage soft tail back in '03.

He still rides and loves it, but I swear that bike spends as much time in the shop as it does on the road.

OK, I'm probably exaggerating again, but it sure seems like every other time I ask him if he wants to ride he tells me his bike is in the shop for something or another.

Other than normal routine and preventative maintenance, I've rebuilt the alternator once, and pulled the carbs to clean and replace seals and gaskets once...oh, and I had some cracks in the left side cargo box that I had to fiberglass up.

That's it in 11 years and almost 70k miles (the Valk was already 2 years old and had 900 miles on it when I bought it, it's a 2000 model).

And I'm with you. I may be a snob when it comes to bikes versus cages, but I'm no bike snob. If you're on two (or even three) wheels and can maintain the speed limit on a state road, I'm happy to ride with you any time.