Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Dumbass Criminal Is A Dumbass...

Joseph in IL sends in this story of a REALLY dumb criminal...

Robber Caught After Leaving Birth Certificate, Note From Mom at Crime Scene
A Boston robber who snatched a woman’s wallet in a schoolyard was handily caught by police after he left his birth certificate and a note from his mother at the scene of the crime.

Zachary Tentoni, 26, of Southington, Conn., was arrested on charges of unarmed robbery on Monday. The alleged robbery victim told police that she had exited the Fields Corner T station in Dorchester and was walking through the schoolyard of Harbor Middle School when a man approached her from behind.
Hoo, boy. I mean, first off, dumbass leaves his stuff behind to steal her clutch purse - i.e. small, as in not likely to contain the crown jewels or a big screen TV. He leaves clothes, sneakers, and other material - as well as identification - behind in order to grab something that might have been of value. Had she only had a few dollars and her driver's license in the purse - or a credit card she could cancel in minutes - he would have actually LOST money on the transaction.

But it gets even better. He gave a fake name to the police when he was apprehended, which is a big no-no and something they can tack onto the charges. I'm still trying to gather why he had his birth certificate on him - it's not something I carry around. I mean, the "note from mom" was most likely a letter from home - you know, put on sunscreen, look both ways before crossing the street, don't leave identifying information lying around when you rob someone - the usual stuff from mom.

I hope his mom's the Italian one, and she beats his ass good the next time he comes home - if for nothing else, for being a colossal dumbass.

That is all.

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