Thursday, March 7, 2013

Ah, Yankee, You Make One Mistake...

(okay, a million internet points to whoever gets *that* reference...)

Joseph in IL sent in this story that illustrates just how dumb criminals can be...

Applebee’s waitress asks patron for ID, gets own stolen driver’s license in return
Imagine you're a waitress, out with friends on a night off, when you lose your wallet. Cash, credit cards, driver's license—all gone. Your bank later informs you that checks are being issued in your name.
It's a pain, but you carry on. Two weeks later, you're at work when four people walk in and sit in your section. They start ordering drinks. You ask to see their IDs. A woman in the group hands a driver's license to you. You look down, and it's yours.
The story doesn't state whether they suspect that the woman in question actually stole the waitress's purse or happened upon her ID. The charges she is facing could stem from her presenting the waitress's driver's license, or she could have been the person who found the purse and was issuing checks. In any case, she loses big points for not noticing that the person whose ID she was using was standing right in front of her.

And here's the best part - she's 26. She had no reason to use the waitress's ID just for a drink. So think about how stupid this bint is. At the very least she is using a license she found - while in possession of narcotics. She's committing a crime - and believe me, every 19 year old kid with a fake ID knows for damn sure they're committing a crime - with using an ID that doesn't belong to her WHILE she is committing another crime. DUH!

Then again, as we've said before, if they weren't so stupid, they might not be criminals.

That is all.


Exurbankevin said...

Is it from "Volunteers"?

Anonymous said...

Was it stupidity, or an outright in-your-face F#$% YOU!! to the waitress?

In microsecods, how long do you think the 'patron' will spend behind bars?

Erin Palette said...

"... you land on wrong ship!"

Crotalus said...

Old WWII joke. Pilot can't fly a mission without doing something wrong. One day, he vows to be really careful and finally gets it right--until he lands, excitedly telling the captain that he finally go it right. The captain says, "Ah, Yankee. You make one mistake."

I reckon this stupid cow ranks just about that bad, though the NAA revolver is single action. Unless it was cocked, (Good Gawd, that's bad! I didn't even intend that one!) I doubt it would go off.

Crotalus said...

Erm, never mind about the NAA mini revolver. That was from the "EEWWWW!" post.

Still, pretty dumb to use a fake I.D. without looking who's asking.

Old NFO said...

Karma, she IS a bitch... :-D

Ed said...

It is ironic that the police cannot release the name of the identity thief. Is it because they do not verify any of her identities or is she in a Witness Protection Program?

Also, how many females change their hair color?