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Monday, December 17, 2012

Perhaps It Was the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch?

Thanks go to Gerry for this feel-good story of the day of a nitwit getting exactly what they deserve...

Texas Church Explodes on Would-Be Thieves
Whether it was negative karma, divine intervention or just god-awful luck, a couple of would-be thieves learned a painful lesson while trying to rob a Houston church.

Westway Baptist Church is without power after the unidentified men apparently attempted to steal the building’s main electric cable for its copper and set off an explosion.

If you guessed "some imbecile got turned into barbecued human by trying to steal a live electric cable", congratulations! You win this round of "Guess the stupid tweaker move!" You *HAVE* to go to the link, though - they have surveillance video of the dumbass in action, and you can see him explode in sparks. Rarely is karma ever so fittingly and timely delivered.

I do have to admit, though, that it's stories like these that make me wonder if Darwin was wrong. How on earth do these people manage to make it to adulthood never having drank out of a bottle with a skull & crossbones on it? Look, you don't need to be an electrical engineer to know that cutting a power line = bad idea. Yet these stories happen with depressing regularity. At least there's video here, good for a chuckle at the dumbass.

I guess if they were smart they wouldn't be trying to steal cable to sell for scrap, right?

That is all.


zOrv said...

The number of the count shall be three...three shall be the number of the count.

Dave H said...

Remember the endless "somewhere in Texas a village is missing its idiot" gags? Looks like they found him.

How on earth do these people manage to make it to adulthood never having drank out of a bottle with a skull & crossbones on it?

Childproof caps, baby locks, and video games.

Exurbankevin said...

That whole "lightning bolt from heaven blasting the those who would defile the sanctuary into pieces" is usually meant to be taken figuratively...

Old NFO said...

LOL, love the response from 'above'... :-)

TOTWTYTR said...

As Gary Larson would say,

"God hit the Smite button".

Anonymous said...

Jesus would forgive but Zeus don't. He throws lighting bolts!


Wraith said...

When I stand before the Lord, may He, in His infinite mercy, forgive me for laughing my ass off at this.

Ygolonac said...

They may have just gotten lucky up until now. A few years back, we had a small change machine (dollar bill to 3 quarters/2 dimes/1 nickel) here at work, attached to the vending machine by a steel cable.

One day I'm going by, and... hmm, you think our facilities guys would have the key to the lock? Oh, wait... the power cord is cut too.

Some skeeve brough bolt cutters, chopped both the security cable and the power line, and probably stuffed the 20-25 pound machine into their backpack - no one saw it leave. Then they got to take it somewhere and bust through the heavy steel to get... more than $15 in mixed change/bills.

Some other moron chopped my extension last month, running from the apartment to my van. :(

Ed said...

... down by the river.