Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Gunnie Guilty Pleasures...

We've all got 'em. That one gun that you absolutely lust for that no one else has ever heard of. Even worse, it's the gun that everyone makes fun of. Or it's a tired cliché from Hollywood that's just been done to death. In any case, here are some of my "gunnie guilty pleasures" - guns that I either own, like, or want to get that just make no sense whatsoever.

But I want 'em anyways...

Beretta 92 - this is the gun I had in mind as a cliché. John McClane carried one. So did Martin Riggs. For a good chunk of the 1980s this was the gun to have - it was to the cop movies of the 1980s what the Colt Detective Special was to the cop shows of the 1960s. Looking back, it was probably the switching of the US Armed Forces from the 1911 to the M9 that was responsible - the Beretta got a LOT of press from the switch and filmmakers capitalized on that newfound popularity.

NAA Mini-22 - Yes, it's a five-shot, single action .22LR revolver. Yes, you do have to take the cylinder completely out to reload (although rumor is that there's a top-break in the works). It is utterly impractical as a defensive arm; totally out of the question as a target gun; even as a plinker it's just not very good. But you know what? You take this teeny little gun out at the range and every person there will want to put a cylinder's worth of .22LR through it.

Desert Eagle - ah, the Deagle. This is another gun that Hollywood helped popularize; however unlike the Beretta 92 the Deagle was not exactly a reliable firearm - I think the most common quip about the Deagle was that it served best as a boat anchor... The niche was that it fired revolver rounds - .357, .41, and .44 Magnum - as well as .50 Action Express. Yes, it was the first .50 caliber handgun, years and years before Smith & Wesson launched their .500 Magnum.

Smith & Wesson .500 Magnum - the new and undisputed (for now) "most powerful handgun in the world", the S&W 500 Magnum makes the list for sheer audacity. It's big - huge in fact. It's MA compliant - yes, you can buy these in MA. Ammunition costs somewhere in the neighborhood of $3 - $4. PER ROUND. And yet, you hand one of these monsters to someone at the range, they're going to need a jackhammer to get the smile off their face...

FN5.7 - oh, sure, from a pistol it's barely more powerful than a .22 Magnum. The pragmatist in me knows this. But the sheer PSH displayed by the gun-grabbers around this gun (ZOMG! It shoots through bulletproof vests!!!11111) make it a must-have for any gunnie that wants to piss off the forces of evil.

Tec-9 - see pretty much everything I wrote about the FN5.7, except that the Tec-9 was (almost) single-handedly responsible for the wording in the 1994 Assault Weapons Ban that dealt with handguns. The available firearms at the time of the ban precluded all but a very small handful of actual pistols - yes, there were some AR-based pistols then, but not many - and the Tec-9 was mentioned by name. That's some serious anti- hate cred goin' on there.

Thompson - the Thompson in semi-auto guise doesn't get a lot of press, mainly because it's quite expensive, insanely heavy, and requires modifications to existing USGI Thompson magazines if one requires pre-ban magazines or does not wish to pay AutoOrdnance's exorbitant price for factory magazines ($70 for a 20 or 30 rounder???). With the serious lack of competition in the .45 carbine entries, though (what's out there besides the Beretta CX4?), the Thompson is one of the only games in town despite the heft and cost.

Coach gun - oh, sure, they cost more than a comparable pump-action shotgun. Sure, they have lower capacity, too. Sure, they're pretty much useless for anyone other than CAS types. But damn, there's just something about a double-barreled 12 gauge with a short barrel and exposed hammers that screams badass. Personally, I blame Val Kilmer as Doc Holliday in "Tombstone" for my unnatural affectation for the coach gun.

SUB2000 - Well, the concept was intriguing... a pistol caliber carbine that folded in the middle so it could be transported in a backpack. Most folks aren't too keen on a rifle that comes apart right after the action, though; combine that with a small aftermarket for accessories and it's a great concept that never really clicked. I'd still love to have one set up for use with Sig P226 magazines, though...

Mini-14 - probably the two biggest drawbacks to the Mini-14 have been that it takes proprietary magazines (rather than the ubiquitous AR-15 magazines) and the accuracy issues. It seemed like a real winner of an idea - take the M-14 platform, make it smaller and lighter and chamber it for the .223 Remington cartridge rather than the .308 Win, and you'd have a rifle that many soldiers were comfortable with and wouldn't scare the white people like that eeeevil black M-16.

So there's my list of guilty pleasures - now what are yours?

That is all.


New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

I'd love to have a BAR. North of 20 pounds, no surplus ammo available to feed it (and they weren't THAT cheap when they were around,) and the gun itself costs north of typical automobile. I still want it, but I don't.

I bet lots of NFA stuff is on folks Guilty Pleasure gun lists.

Ooooo, that MP40 shot like a dream.

George said...

I have a Sub-2000. Horrible trigger, middling to poor ergonomics. Still, takes my Glock 22 mags, folds up into a backpack, and has been super reliable. It's my car gun for when I travel to NY and other places I can't bring my carry guns.

Ross said...

Hmm... Well, there's my Model 19. Everybody can't wait to tell me how I can't shoot a steady diet of magnum loads through it but so far, it's eating them up with no sign of the flamecutting I keep getting warned about. And, of course, at only 6 rounds, I'm going to get outgunned by all the gang-bangers with their 15 round Glock Fotays... *rolleyes*

And I, too, have an NAA Mini. I'm getting a .22LR cylinder for it, too. It's just so cute... as is my Beretta 21A, the NAA's semi-auto cousin. In .22LR, of course.

M1 Carbine - another underpowered rifle but it's just so much FUN to shoot.

Lessee... my gun lust list has a Henry AR-7 (takedown .22 rifle) on it - cute factor, can fit in my bike saddle bags, accurate. I'd also love to get a PMR30... except I live in the PRM. *insert five minutes of vituperation screamed at Martha Coakley and the assmuppets on Bacon Hill who passed our AWB here* The PMR30 is a .22WMR semiauto handgun made by KelTec with a THIRTY round magazine. I WANT one.

Robert said...

The coach gun held a special place for me as well. Mostly because as I was growing up I would frequent a certain wild west themed amusement park, where they would stage gunfights, and the sheriff carried one.

The other would be the FN-FAL. Although would that qualify as a "guilty" pleasure?

Cher said...

I have no real desire to own a 1911 . . . yeah it's all awesome and tough and stuff.

That is until I spied a luscious, sexy, shimmering Colt Gold Cup in a display case at a local gun shop. ME WANT NOW!! My hunny won't let me get it. Apparently the $2500 price tag is somewhat daunting.

I want want want it, RIGHT NOW! . . . (off you go to the incinerator Veruca Salt)

Then on another trip to a different gun shop I saw ANOTHER Colt 1911 Special in a glistening stainless and nickel and blue and OMG it was freaking HOT. Again, my sweet Mopar won't get it for me. WTF? I'm not worth a few thousand bucks?

Yes, it's true. I lust and my desire will not be fulfilled . . .

Pity me.

Mike Y said...

I just bought a Stoeger Coach Gun last week to use for CAS. I took it squirrel hunting yesterday. Great gun for hiking through brush.

elmo iscariot said...

I'll do you one better: I want a NAA mini in .22 short. It's uselesser than the LR or WMR versions in all the ways they're already useless, but damn, I love them bitty little cartridges.

bluesun said...

I kinda want a Mossberg 500 that's been completely tacticooled... rails all over, lasers, flashlights, bayonet....

Blackwing1 said...

A Coonan 1911 in .357. I have no idea what I'd use it for, but I'd really love to have one. Just 'cause.

Jay G said...


Ooh, that's a good one. A BAR, even the modern semi-auto repros, is a damn fine guilty pleasure.

And yeah, most NFA stuff makes the list. In fact, you reminded me of my most famoust guilty pleasure:

The Mossberg 590 with 14" barrel and pistol grip.

It'd cost me about double what a new 590 costs once the NFA stamp is paid. It would take several months to get to me. I'd have to jump through all the NFA hoops for four little inches.

But DAMN that is a fun gun...


Like I said, someday when I have no other gun needs on the list I'm gonna order a SUB2000 that takes Sig P226 9mm mags. Because I've already got over a dozen pre-bans, so why not?


That's an interesting take on a guilty pleasure, but you're absolutely right - everyone tells you that the S&W 19 is wrong, wrong, wrong for so many reasons, yet it feels so right...

And the AR-7 is a *perfect* Guilty pleasure, especially for me - I've already got a bunch of .22 rifles, but boy would I like one of those!


I'd hesitate to call "the right arm of freedom" a guilty pleasure - unless you're collecting one of every possible variant, perhaps... :)


As blasphemous as it may be, the SW1911 that I just picked up is every bit as nice as my Gold Cup. Next bloggershoot I'll bring them both and you can try 'em side by side - the SW1911 is a LOT cheaper.

But damn, the Gold Cup is a nice shootin' gun...

Mike Y,

Ooh, good point. I don't hunt, so I don't consider those applications (even though there are more than a couple double barreled shotguns in the G. armory...)


Heh. The NAA mini 22 in .22 Short is, if I'm not mistaken, the smallest functioning firearm currently on the market. I prefer mine in .22LR just so I don't have to stock another caliber (although most of my .22LR arms can also shoot the short; I am a notoriously cheap bastard *and* I have a couple zillion rounds of .22LR...)


Get the 590 for tacticool - then you have a bayonet lug too... :)


OOH, the Coonan. 1911 style in .357 Magnum (my favorite caliber). Good choice!

I'd add a Colt Delta Elite (1911 in 10mm) to the list as well - fragile (according to the h8rs) and shoots an expensive, hard-to-find round. But very cool!

elmo iscariot said...

...although most of my .22LR arms can also shoot the short...

I dunno if it's true of all .22s, but in my fiancee's NAA mini (WMR version, with a LR conversion cylinder) .22 shorts don't go anywhere near the point of aim. At about ten feet, you have to aim at the top of the paper to get 'em anywhere near the center of the target.

JoeMerchant24 said...

BAR - Ab-so-freakin-lutely

Serbu Super Shorty - Because pain can be fun!

Mare's Leg - Are you gonna argue with Steve McQueen and Zoe?

S&W Model 29 - Do you feel lucky?

AR-7 - Someone beat me to it.

DS Arms FAL carbine - I dream of these when ever a car with a fart muffler and booming stereo drive by

Saiga 12 - With the full blown Romak job, natch.

AMT Hardballer longslide - Maglite sized laser designator optional.

.44 Automag - What can I say, I read Don Pendleton books as an impressionable youth.

.408 CheyTac Intervention - Never know when you may have to pop a can of Dinty Moore from a mile or more out.

Derringer - So tiny. So gentile. So steampunk.

Bren Ten - Sonny Crockett, Col. Cooper and magazines made from pure unobtanium!

ExurbanKevin said...

The Sub2k and the Mini-14, definitely. I was a fan of the AC-556 before The A-Team, and I remain a fan to this day. Once you accurize a Mini-14 to shoot MOA-ish, you end up with rifle that costs as much as a quality AR, but that's not the point.

And the M-1 Carbine. Definitely.

Another guilty pleasure (for me) is an AK. I don't need one, the AR's I already own fill any foreseeable need I might have, but dammit, I want one.

Phillip said...

I have an NAA mini that has the .22 and .22WMR cylinders. I actually carry it in my pants pocket as a BUG, and I feel perfectly fine with that idea. If I'm wearing pants, that's with me. I've also taken it swimming a time or two.

My guilty pleasures list is semi-practical, and involves things I may get someday if there's no money problem... like when the kids are done with college.

1. Saiga 12. The idea of a 12 gauge on an AK platform firing many many rounds out of a quick change magazine just appeals to my inner Monster Hunter.

2. SU16-C. Pack it in your suitcase, you never have to worry about that dodgy hotel you have to spend the night at because your car broke down right there. Yeah, too many horror movies.

3. Just about anything full auto. I know that full auto isn't as good an idea as some people think, and it's just a fast way of turning money into smoke and noise, but the idea appeals anyway.

4. Sig Mosquito with a silencer. Quiet practice in the back yard without the neighbors knowing what I'm doing. Yay!

That's all that pops off the top of my head. I'm sure there are others that will come to mind in about three seconds after I hit Publish.

Papa Whiskey said...

Holland and Holland Royal .500 NE.
Might as well dream big.

maddmedic said...

Large Bore handgun. I enjoy hunting. I carry a Ruger .357 GP 100 with a 4 inch barrel. Along with rifle or slug gun. Would like something with a 6 inch barrel and the option of putting some type of optics on it.

Coonan .357. Shot one this fall at Ahlman's Shooters Jamboree. Want!!


Ruger 10/22.

And maybe just maybe someday a pocket pistol. Maybe.

And a bigger gun safe.....Is it sinful to have to many guns?

Stretch said...

The FN5.7 is extra cool 'cause you can hunt lions and bears with it. Really! A L.A.P.D. Deputy chief said so!

For real guilt get the FAL in .243. Closer to the round the weapon was designed for and a whole lot easier to handle than .308. Don't think DS catalogs that chambering any more.

My lottery gun is gonna be a Ma Duce. To make Sarah Brady cry and John Moses Browning smile.

Bubblehead Les. said...

Back in my WW2 Re-enacting days, one of the guys in my unit had one of the Semi-auto BAR's from Ohio Ordinance. It soon earned the nickname "Mrs. Doubtfire", not because of the weapon itself, but the magazines that are available suck, and no one is making new ones that work. After humping one with its load all day, I looked forward to carry my Uber lightweight M1 Garand. That BAR is frackin' heavy! Be good for checkpoints/roadblocks and any place you stay put, though. Definitely a Young Person's/Strong Back/Weak Mind gun.

I want a Coach Gun, because one can load it, lower the hammers, put it on the mantle, come back 5 years later, and it should shoot. Of course, not for homes with small children.

My personal Dream Gun? Soviet PKM. Big bore caliber, Cheap ammo (so far), reliable and designed to be carried. Heavy? Yeah, but a 50 round belt vs. a 20 round BAR magazine.....

And a Barrett in 50 cal. Long Distance, the next best thing to being there.

And an Uzi or 2 , just in case I'm stuck in the City when a Level 4 Zombie outbreak occurs.

And 10,000 rounds of quality Ammo for each weapon I own, plus a minimum of 10 Magazines for those guns that take it, but 20 would be better.

But in the Real World, on my budget, with it's cost of Ammo, supply of Ammo and reliability, I'm working towards a couple of Springfield XD(m)'s in 9mm (Wife loves the Gun) and a couple of AK's in 7.62.
Should help us a lot WTSHTF.

But there's just something about a Colt SAA and a Winchester 92......

Butch Cassidy said...

Cap and ball blackpowder NAA mini - I love black powder, and the idea of little bitty gun with big plume of smoke...

Kel-Tec Sub-2000: To go with my Beretta 96, and I have a thing for spartan utilitarian designs.

Colt Police Positive in 32 S&W Long - The little things are stupid fun.

Charter Arms Pink Lady - I can subdue and humiliate the mugger.

MAS-36 - Esoteric round, no safety, made by cheese-eating surrender-monkeys, funky aperture sight picture, blah blah, I want one, they feel nice on my shoulder.

McThag said...

Three words: Belt Fed Semiauto.

JP556 said...

Well since my trackback does not seem to work. Here is my shameless plug for the day.

My guilty pleasure: Rossi Ranch Hand:

dmsith512 said...

45 ACP carbines do exists


HiPoint is also coming out with one.

Bob H said...

FNH PS90 (since the P90 isn't available) with the 50 round magazine. Yes, I know it is a "Tiny little bullet, with little more power than a .22 WMR..." Not so
From what I have found so far is that the FNH Five SeveN has the same velocity from the pistol that .22WMR does out of a rifle. With the PS90's 16" barrel it is much hotter.
My wife (tiny person) loves the FiveSeveN and it's 20 rounds as a house gun.
Besides the PS90 is a sure range magnet. With my (poor but improving) shooting, it would be nice to actually not see people at the range laughing...

JB Miller said...

I made a list here!

Atom Smasher said...

Well, I don't consider them guilty, but my "Grail" guns are the BAR and Thompson in full-auto (a dim possibility back before the tech crash but no way now), a Garand (just have to CMP my lazy butt for that), a wood-furniture CETME and a coach gun.

So some are gettable, some are not.

I had a Beretta 96 for a long time but I dumped it when I got rid of my Sig P229 - no more .40 for this guy and I never could shoot the Beretta worth a damn. New springs, watch the wrist break, blah blah blah. In the end I think it was just the grip being too fat for my average hand size.

Skip said...

If I won the lottery....Robert Stacks lever gun, Ludic trap gun, SAW, matched 1911s by Brown, coach gun, 92F with a can, .338 Lapua w/ Nightforce,
I got drool on the keyes prolly better stop.

Theredneckengineer said...

1918 BAR. No need for an explanation. No need for a need.

Springfield SOCOM II. Can't think of a specified use, but do I want one? You bet.

RPD or MG 42. Semi auto or full. Either way makes for a useless plinker but man do I want one or ten.

Serbu super shorty in 20 and 12 gauge. I <3 expensive pain.

mopar said...

Scary thing that a fair number of the affordable ones mentioned are already in the Mopar family safe!

I have a HUGE list, but here are a few:
AR15: Yes, really. Have never owned one. Until now. In the final stages of building a National Match AR. Makes no sense whatsoever! It's about as UNtacticool an AR can possibly be, costs twice the price of all the cool ARs, uses the outdated A2 stock and upper with fixed carry handle, doesn't have any optics and probably wont be any more accurate then some of the other rifles I already own.

HK91: Because of CT's AWB (spit!) I can not own one. However, I can own a PTR91 which is made locally and is a pretty exact clone of the HK. So basically I'd like to spend a few grand on an outdated design battlerifle that is not particularly accurate, shoots fairly expensive ammo while mangling the brass so you cant even reload it, but has dirt cheap magazines.

Some type of long range precision rifle, something that can reach out and touch someone at 1000yrds.
Forget that I would have to drive several hours to have a chance to even shoot a THIRD of that distance, and I think the nearest 1000yrd range is 3 states away. Forget that the glass alone on such a setup would cost more then any firearm I currently own.

Keltec RFB: Fugly as sin AND expensive to own and shoot, what's not to love?

Mauser C96: This just takes ugly and expensive to whole new levels, and is probably at the very top of my grail gun list. WANT!